I can remember being a little girl and playing outside for as long as possible. I remember running through the neighborhood – with bare feet, of course – climbing trees, tossing a football, jumping on trampolines. I dreaded that time when the street lights came on because I knew my mom would be coming out on the front porch to call us inside. I would always try to hide from her or would just whine and complain with every step to the front door. I don’t want to go in! I want to keep playing! But I’m fine out here! I can still see! I know what I’m doing! I’m okay on my own! I can handle this! Let me do it!

It wouldn’t be far-fetched to say that I’ve seen God the exact same way this past year. He’s been stepping out on the porch and calling me to him. The funny thing is, I’ve been scared to give him all of me; to fully step into his goodness. Why? Your answer is as good as mine…but it’s just that fear of stepping out in the unknown. Who wouldn’t be scared to leave home without a job to go chase after her life? Who wouldn’t be terrified to join up with the most solid team of people who know each other so well and have to not only be the new kid, but the young kid? Who wouldn’t rather hide when you make a huge mistake and have to regroup?

The painful beauty in all of this is that, with each time he’s called me to the porch, I’ve grown. I’ve learned to trust people in a whole new way. I’ve learned just who I am and what I’m capable of. I’ve learned (the hard way) that I can’t do everything, and I can’t do it alone.

A year ago, I wrote out the job I thought I wanted. God is still far more gracious to me than I deserve. And it just so happens that today is a pretty big day for me. Today marks my first year of serving with the staff that I now call family at Cross Point. A year of trials. A year of errors. A year of successes. A year of laughter…of tears…of misses…of fears…of happiness. A year of growth. I’m not dumb enough to believe that it hasn’t been all perfect, it never will be. But it’s been all good. There is beauty in messing up so bad that you have to have others pick you up. That kind of growth can’t be done alone. I am so fortunate that this day was a Tuesday where I got to see each member of my family and truly realize what a difference – not even a year makes – what a DAY makes. These people have changed my heart and my world and I am so thankful that they’ve allowed me in to their lives. I can’t imagine doing life without them, and I hope I never have to.

Tonight, we’re having our 2nd Worship Night here at the Nashville Campus. I can’t think of a better way to celebrate than spending some time glorifying the one who freely gives it all for us and who has blessed me so much more than I deserve.